Grief Written

I am filled with pink promises with crossed fingers behind my back I've got more death wishes than dreams  and I write suicide notes on the back of to do lists and laugh at the irony  I lean over railings and walk curbs like they're tight ropes Sometimes I lay upside down on my bed to feel all the blood rush to my head and I wonder how much blood the human body holds and it makes me dizzy but then I sit up and it all fades and I wish I could just sit up and this would all fade I'm always crying and crying and crying I don't know how to stop I store water in the well of sadness deep inside me I've broken my heart open a thousand times for people who weren't even thirsty and so the water just continues to spill over the sides maybe we'll enter a drought  I think about heartbreak and how you can actually die from it and wonder if I will when I feel it every time and how is it that my god damn heart is so resilient  I f

I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you              Please come home  I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you